I have problem related to my shop. I have two employ in my shop. One of them say Mr.abc is little more experienced and working with me since 2 year.
Other is working with me since 1year say Mr.xyz. Mr. abc is becomming more dominant on Mr. xyz. Both of them are really very useful to me and also makes much profit for me. Also I am giving them nice pay. Mr.xyz doesn't like that Mr.abc becomes senior and dominant on him. Mr. abc want Mr.xyz to leave the job so he is doing such acts which tortures Mr.xyz. Also both of them cannot adjust and work as a team. I do not want any one to leave the job, but it is probable that Mr.xyz will leave the job. What can I do to solve this matter.
Solution:
For Xyz, ask him if it's ok with him to have a talk with Abc with you there.
When it's ok, ask him about specific behaviors (observable only) that affect him in a negative way.
When talking to Abc, it's important that Abc realize the specific acts that he did that affected Xyz.
These can be words that he said, specific acts that he did, etc. Once Xyz has enumerated them, have that discussion.
Start the discussion by stating that there appears to be some conflict between the two of them. Chances are, Abc will deny it. But as you proceed, state that at least there is an offended party.
Proceed then by allowing Xyz to state the facts.
Be sure to apply brakes when Xyz starts saying things about his feelings.
It is important that he stick to the facts. One behavior at a time. After each behavior is described, ask Abc if he remembers doing that. If he says yes, then ask Xyz how he felt when that happened. Then ask Abc if he would feel the same way if the same thing was done to him. If he says yes, ask Abc if he now understands how Xyz felt. If he says yes, you can proceed to the next behavior, and so forth.
If Abc says no in any question, don't proceed. If he doesn't recall the behavior, ask Xyz to elaborate further with details to make sure Abc recalls. If Xyz can present evidence, so much the better. If Abc says he will not feel the same way if that was done to him, simply tell him that the act offended Xyz and as a fact, damage has been done. If Abc says that he doesn't understand how Xyz felt, simply ask back "but didn't you just say that you would also feel bad if that was done to you?"
As for Abc's need to be respected. Give him that. He deserves it. Show him how valuable he is by reminding him that as a veteran of the company, it's his responsibility to care for the company's assets which include other employees. You might also want to tap him for other responsibilities that will make him feel valued.
The main objective of this exercise is to isolate the behaviors that were offensive. Even if you were not able to change their perspectives, at least you can ensure that those offensive behaviors don't happen again.
Should the behaviors recur, have a personal chat with Abc and reiterate that you don't want to see those things done again because it's causing harm to the other employee.
Tell Abc that if this happens again, it is now an example of disrespect to you as owner.
Some things to remember:
1. Some of the behaviors that affect Xyz may be too petty but add to the damage. In this case, ask Xyz how it offends him and if he says that this adds to the overall damage, tell him to stick to specific behaviors because once you resolve this, those petty behaviors may still occur and it's important that Xyz overcome this as well.
2. If Abc states his own issues, do the same thing with him as you did to Xyz. Stick to behaviors that offended him.
3. Maintain impartiality. Don't make any of the party’s feel you're on their side. Establish the stance that you are after resolving the conflict since you want them to work together.
4. After making sure that they have understood each other's sides, leave them to give them time to patch things up between them but without you present.
- Forwarded by Sanjay Sir (eMail)
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